Alan Lim asked:


What are the Tips on Online dating

Use only FREE email accounts with sites such as Yahoo, Gmail, Bigfoot and Hotmail. In this way you make easy correspondence while keeping your local email secure.

Do not create a profile name that gives a clue as to where you’re from and who you are. Choose a simple nickname but far from your true identity, to avoid getting your personal information accessed by unwanted individuals. Also, when filling up your profile, do not reveal too much personal data.

Conversation when online dating:

• Ensure secrecy. Never provide anyone with your personal information such as address, full name, phone number and email address. Take it as a warning if anybody who asks you these early in the conversation. Stop communicating immediately when you feel uncomfortable as you are the one in control here

• Remain anonymous. Don’t give personal information readily when dating online. During online dating, ask lots of questions. Ask him/her about his/her hobbies, education, career and interests. Take note of all of these, as the person you are talking to needs to be consistent. If they are not consistent then chances are they are not being truthful with you and not worth your time.

• Be honest. Likewise in your end, be honest enough, but also remember not to give too much information as far as your work and home address is concerned. Just be truthful with your conversations. Convey your intentions as clearly as possible. And if you don’t like him/her, tell him/her politely. Don’t find excuses and give him/her the impression that you are interested in meeting with him/her.

• Be safe. When both of you feel that it is time to be talking on the phone, the man should be the one to give the girl his number and the girl should be the one to call the man. The girl should never give her phone number when dating online.

• Be protected. When you are sure that you want to meet the person in face, ask him for references, such as his friends, relatives or co- workers. This is not to give them the feeling that you don’t trust them, but if they too trust you, they would understand that you are very much willing to meet with him, but you just want to be on the safe side. If he is genuine and is sincerely interested in you, he has nothing to be afraid of and should oblige your request.

The meeting:

• Inform somebody of the meeting. Make certain you tell your friend or a member of the family where exactly are you going and who you’re meeting.

• Remember to bring your cell phone along, so that you can call your friend right away during emergency.

• Use common sense and judge accordingly when online dating.

• Meet him/her in a public place such as park, museum, or anywhere as long as there are a lot of people.

Dos and Don’ts on your first date:

• Do be on time.

• Do look good and be neat.

• Do compliment.

• Do make your date comfortable.

• Do listen.

• Do talk about something you have a common interest with

• Do be an exciting date. Listen to your date and make sure to let your date feel that you are interested with all that he/she has to say.

• Do ask your date about her hobbies, career and future plans.

• Do be romantic.

• Do enjoy your moment together.

• Do laugh at her jokes.

• Do be yourself.

• Do avoid touching.

Don’ts

• Don’t be late.

• Don’t talk about your past relationship.

• Don’t pretend.

• Don’t ask too much questions.

• Don’t show disrespect to your date’s beliefs.

• Don’t forget to say thank you after the date.

So do you think you are ready for dating online? Just be cautious and practice common sense and you will find that online dating can be a fun and wonderful experience.



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Deborrah Cooper asked:


Avoid unnecessary heartbreak and wasting time in dead-end relationships. Here are seven indicators that a “crash and burn” may be in your future!

1. Partner Still Involved With The Ex.

Can we say “rebound?” It’s common to meet singles who are having a difficult time letting go of the past. You’ll notice disturbing behavior: the Ex’s name comes up frequently in conversations; there may be regular phone calls, secretive visits, frequent arguments and a lot of unresolved pain between them. You may think that if you love enough, you can make it all better.

Realistically, it takes years for hearts to fully heal; some never hit the mark. While you sit there smugly thinking “well s/he is here with ME” remember that you only have the body - the Ex has their heart. Are you prepared to wait around for weeks, months, years with no guarantees you’ll EVER get the love you want? I suggest you not waste time fighting ghosts of the past.

2. Desperation Fuels Your Search.

Some singles are very ready for a relationship. That readiness for commitment comes across as anxiety about finding someone - desperate and fearful anxiety. With biological clocks ticking and heart in hand, you attach yourself to the first person that shows interest, no matter how inappropriate.

Though this individual is NOTHING you ever claimed to want, you desperately hang on trying to “make it work.” Or you may find yourself repeatedly involved in passionate relationships with people that are emotionally mentally or physically unavailable (i.e. married, long-distance Internet relationships, convicts, workaholics with no time for you, or sex-based FWBs that leave you feeling used and lonely). Your friends and family scratch their heads and wonder what you see that they don’t. You have no real defense other than “you can’t help who you love!”

3. Unrealistic Expectations of Perfection.

Every time the phrase “you should” comes out of your mouth, you are judging and holding yourself up to be superior. Anytime the words “why don’t you” escape your lips, you are expressing your disapproval. You are trying to CHANGE someone. When energy is expended attempting to change the other to become what YOU think they should be there is trouble ahead. Anyway, you aren’t perfect yourself, so why insist someone else try to be?

True love is constructed on a foundation of respect, commonality and acceptance. However, incompatible sexual beliefs, lifestyle choices, and/or gender role expectations will cause insurmountable rifts. If there is such a vast difference in values, beliefs or lifestyles that you find your mate’s preferences to be distasteful, the problem here is not them, it’s YOU.

4. Displays of Jealous, Obsessive, Controlling or Abusive Behavior.

Abuse can be insidious and not easily recognizable, but usually one is left with visible bruises and damaged self-confidence. Pushing, name-calling, pinching, slapping, arm-twisting and punching are abusive intimidation tactics. Damaging your property to “get you back,” unwarranted anger and jealousy that makes you walk on eggshells are others.

Hurtful, mean, disparaging words said to you are common psychologically abusive behaviors. And of course your mate is sorry and promises not to do it again — until the next time. Abusers must get only ONE chance. If you are ever physically assaulted, fearful of injury for any reason, or verbally insulted even once, please close the door on that relationship immediately.

5. You Can’t Stand Your Mate’s Friends, Family or Children.

Should you marry, your mate becomes a part of your family, and you a part of theirs. If you cannot blend your close friends and loved ones with those of your mate during the dating process, there will be serious conflict down the road. And it’s not reasonable to expect your partner to give up childhood friends or forego family bonds important to them. Just remember that “blood is thicker than water.” If you **** your mate’s friends and family and they are aware of it, they’ll soon close ranks and you’ll be out.

6. Giving Too Much.

When your love for yourself is affected by your love for someone else, you are on a downhill slide. Being considerate is important, but not when it means you sacrifice your safety, financial stability or health! You are guilty of giving too much if you put aside condoms, rewarding hobbies, interests, loving friends or family because of your mate’s negative comments. Your world becomes smaller as you center it around pleasing your mate and sacrificing yourself. Love cannot blossom without respect. Stand up for yourself; demand fairness and equality in both giving and receiving! Make no excuses. Anyone coming into your life not up to par with regards to maturity or responsibility must be put in the “reject” pile.

7. Strong Evidence of Lying.

Honesty and the trust it establishes is at the core of any loving relationship. Lying, pretense, and factual omissions damage trust. Compulsive liars possess a serious character flaw, and they never change. Ask yourself what is it that your mate is trying to hide or pretend to be and why?

Anyone that won’t tell the truth about themselves, beliefs or behaviors is afraid of being exposed, which means you cannot ever be truly intimate partners. If you’ve caught your mate lying and feel that you cannot trust him or her anymore, why are you staying? Where can this situation go but up in smoke?

Closing your eyes to these seven warning signs won’t make the problem go away. What you see is what you get. Your goal is to find someone you can share your spirit with, as well as your heart and life. Realistically assess each potential partner you meet until you find a solid, secure fit that feels like you’ve come home.



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Ann Marier asked:


Dating can be quite a lot of fun, but it can also be quite stressful too. Although some people prefer to have their relationships become serious after only a couple of dates, dating is ideally more of a gradual process of getting to know each other. Thus, it is important to utilize some dating conversation tips during those first several important dates.

Dating Conversation Tip #1: Finding Common Ground

Whether the couple met through friends, a dating website, or some other method, there must have been a reason why the couple has chosen to go out on a date in the first place. Yes, physical attraction is important, but beyond that, it is necessary that the couple find similar interests.

Thus, as a dating conversation tip, when it comes to similar interests, the easiest way for someone to start a conversation is by asking the simple question, “What do you like to do in your free time?” Most likely, the other person will list off a variety of different things. If one, or even several of those things are also liked by that other person, that person should immediately mention that.

Those first few conversations might still be a bit tense, with each person not knowing what interesting thing to say to the other person. However, once someone has used the dating conversation tip about asking what the other person likes to do, and found common interests, that can be used as the basis for a variety of humorous anecdotes about those interests.

Dating Conversation Tip #2: Use Humor

No matter how serious a person is, chances are that person still likes to laugh at something. Humor is necessary in any dating scenario, because not only does it lighten what might be a stressful situation, but it also creates the opportunity for the couple to create private jokes between each other, which is a fun way of solidifying a relationship.

Dating Conversation Tip #3: Learn from Differences

Although it is important for a couple to share similar interests in some things, it would be boring for a couple to like all of the same things. Thus, during a conversation it is important to mention hobbies that the other person might not enjoy but be curious about, and this could be the basis for a future date.

During these initial conversations, it is important for the couple to keep the conversations light, and not too personal. More personal conversations should be reserved for if and when the couple decides to have a serious relationship. Above, all, it is important for the couple to relax and be themselves, because dating is, after all, supposed to be a fun experience!



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