Yvonne Kelly asked:


If you are a single person on the dating scene today, there is an excellent chance you will someday be dating a partner with children. And of course, if you are already a single parent dating, you will definitely be in a relationship that involves your children and potentially your partner’s children. In both cases there are some things you should know as you head into the step dating realm.

The term Step Dating is applied when two single parents date or when a single dates a single parent. We refer to is as “Step” Dating because the dynamics have so much in common with living in a stepfamily, or a blended family for that matter.

It is important for single parents and their partners to be aware of these dynamics in order to navigate a successful step dating relationship while also safeguarding the rights and interests of the children. It is particularly important if they are embarking on a serious commitment that may lead to remarriage. If it sounds easy, it isn’t; just ask anyone who has been there and they will tell you that there are many myths that lead people astray and at a basic level, it is not easy for partners to talk about or address the somewhat sensitive issues that arise in a step dating relationship. Let’s touch on two common themes that tend to trip people up, both of which revolve around a misunderstanding of the role love plays in step relationships.

1.) Biological parents are of course not just looking for a potential mate, but are hoping to find someone that could be a suitable stepparent to his or her children. In doing so, their enthusiasm about a new relationship, can often translate into expectations that their dating partner will “love” their children. This tends to put a lot of pressure on their partner, whether they have children of their own or not and it is simply not a very realistic expectation. It is very important for people to know that loving the other person’s child(ren) is not a prerequisite for a healthy adult relationship or even for a successful step family. As the relationship progresses, the requirements include having a healthy concern for the well-being of your partner’s children, ability to understand, respect and protect their rights, and a willingness to serve as a role model and friend to them. But the pressure to bond with and or love another person’s biological children in the context of a step dating relationship almost always backfires and actually makes it harder for individuals to get to know and get close to their partner’s children. It can also create resentment between the partners if unrealistic expectations go unchecked and unmet.

2.) It is a common misconception in dating relationships of all kinds, that Love Will Indeed Conquer All. The truth is, that almost all couples who enter into step dating relationships and certainly the majority who go on to make a remarriage commitment, on some level trust that their love will get them through and yet the stats tell us a very different story. We have a divorce rate in second marriages with children that hovers around 50-60% in Canada 60-70% in the US. So love alone is not saving second marriages from the clutches of separation and divorce. When you cite these alarming statistics, people often respond by saying that “those other couples just didn’t love each other enough”, but WE DO! Being naïve about what is required beyond love in any relationship, is a recipe for disaster and even more so in highly complex step relationships.

Love is undeniably very important but learning what you can expect in your relationship, how to plan for it, and how to make good relationship choices will significantly increase your chances of success in step relationships at any stage. The reality is that step dating relationships and the step families that often result from them are more complex and come loaded with challenges that couples must prepare themselves for, in addition to cultivating and nurturing their love for one another. The following Seven Steps are highly recommended to assist couples in making good relationship decisions and facing challenges they can expect in a step dating relationship.

1.) Get clear on what type of relationship you are looking for, what matters to you most and what you are willing to commit to in a relationship.

2.) Get to know each other and the children involved, Very Well, over a significant period of time.

3.) Observe how the children respond and interact within the new relationship.

4.) Learn everything you can about step family dynamics which are alive and well during the step dating phase.

5.) Discover what your roles with each other’s children, should be at the various stages of relationship development.

6.) Be honest with yourself about whether this is the right relationship for you. Don’t be afraid to recognize red flags or warning signs that may be telling you this is not the right relationship for you or for you and your child(ren). Now is the time to be choosy.

7.) Don’t avoid the tough or sensitive issues and if you are having difficulty discussing certain things with your partner, seek out professional support to assist you in having those all too important discussions. If you are finding yourself resisting asking a question or bringing up a particular issue, chances are these are the very things that need to be addressed if the relationship has any chance of progressing forward.

From step dating through to remarriage and second families, couples are required to be aware of what, beyond love, is required to make their relationships work. It begins with being able to balance the feeling aspects of romance and love with an emphasis on knowing what you are looking for in a relationship (your requirements) and making conscious choices that will satisfy your needs and requirements. There is a lot at stake for single parents and singles dating single parents and the importance of balancing your head’s intentions with your heart’s inclinations is undeniably essential.



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Christopher Ricardo Scipio asked:


Resisting the Urge to Only Date Others with Herpes.

My girlfriend and I broke-up (amiably) three weeks ago today.

It was unexpected since we were getting along very well and still love each other very much. But we didn’t agree on how the relationship should be in the future so we decided it was better to stop now than face a certain break-up down the line.

So I am suddenly single and am in an awkward position.

I hear that voice at the back of my head saying, “Christopher” wouldn’t it be so much easier to just look for women with herpes to date?”

The voice is right of course, yes it would be easier.

I am resisting that voice, as I have always resisted that voice.

I believe that I still have the right to love whoever I want to love regardless of the fact that i have herpes. I believe I would be ghettoizing myself and taking the easier way out just by looking for women with herpes. I would be buying into the mean-spirited stigma that says I should be marginalized, I should be banned from loving the uninfected.

I know i have my responsibilities. I live the life of a responsible person with herpes. I have treated my herpes with herbal medicine so I have only had one outbreak in the past four years. I warn my potential partners about my herpes status as early into the courtship as possible- usually before the first date. I practice safer sexuality and use an anti-viral gel to limit the risk of infecting others.

I feel that i have the right to go out into the world and not have the virus control my social life.

Don’t get me wrong, having to warn people about my herpes and anticipate their reactions is not my idea of a good-time, but It’s small price to pay, in my mind, for having a the right to date outside of the herpes community.

I will also be open to dating those with herpes of course, but it won’t be a preference one way or the other, just like I have no preference for race or hair colour or eye colour.

My heart and mind are completely open to whoever spirit brings into my life next.

christopher scipio homeopath/herbalist holistic viral specialist



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Muna wa Wanjiru asked:


If you are interested in online dating, then you should be aware of the Online dating scams. This is a serious problem since it will not only hurt your emotional feelings but will also hurt your finances. If you want to go deeply involved in online dating, then you must be careful about the scams. Most of the online dating sites are offering free services. This really means that anybody can cheat you by sending the photo of some unknown model.

There are 4 types of online dating scams. They are

1. Phone scams.

2. ********** scams.

3. Travel scam

4. Nigerian Postal scam.

1. Phone scam:

Phone scam is the oldest form of online dating scams. Anyone may ask you to make a call to him\her. If you make a call then you will get a bill for thousands of dollars.

2. ********** scam:

Prostitutes may place their photos in online dating sites to solicit their business. You can easily find such profiles by grubby user name and steamy self descriptions.

3. Travel scams:

The person may tell you that he\she is residing in overseas and wants money to meet travel expenses in order to meet you.

4. Nigerian postal scam:

Here the person may pretend that he\she is a relative of a deceased government official and ask money for the financial transactions.

These are the 4 main types of online dating scams. The following guidance will help you to make your dating experience safe and secure. When you look at the profile, concentrate more on sleazy names. Though boys are always thinking about sex, sincere women do not think like that. Hence profile with sleazy name like “the sweetest sin” should be carefully avoided.

Then read the profile carefully. People who are likely to cheat others will say something vague that will fit anyone. Then look at the photos. Photographs of beautiful women in combination with vague profile really mean some trouble. Beautiful women will be more selective and they will definitely include more requirements in their profiles. Women will not be ready to talk about *** naturally. If anyone does then you can decide that she is a liar.

Another important warning is about overseas profiles. Some people may reveal that they are residing in local in the profile but when you want to talk to them they will say that they are living in overseas. You should treat such profiles as potential scams. If the location does not match then immediately drop the profile. This will help you to save your time. Though you have decided to select anyone for dating, don’t get emotionally attached in the initial stage itself.

Sometimes the person may ask you money saying that his\her relative is not feeling well and he\she is in urgent need of money. You can decide that long distance along with the request for money really mean for scam. You can simply avoid this. Whenever you are going for online dating, please remember the above mentioned points and  search an honest and sincere dating partner.



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Janet Francis asked:


Gay Dating- It’s not over till the fat lady sings.

So the honeymoon period is over, things aren’t so good, he looks bored and you feel deflated, are you both just tired or are these warning signs that the relationship is on the brink of failure and it’s time to move on? We look at these signs and offer you an insight into them so you can recognise them earlier.

Arguing- all couples argue, this doesn’t necessarily mean the relationship is on the rocks. Next time you argue over something trivial ask yourself why you’re both doing this? Is it keeping the sparks flying in your relationship or simply giving you both something to talk about.

Is he still your soul mate? Imagine something really bad has just happened, who would you call first? Is it him? Now imagine something really great has just happened and ask yourself the same question. If neither of those answers is him you’re in trouble dear.

Things seem to be lacking. A lot of people focus their relationship breakdown to the physical side of things, like sex, but it’s the mental things too, like the lack of conversation that should ring alarm bells in your head.

Revisiting the menu, even after you’ve picked and received your dish, with your dish right in front of you. In other words checking out other men even when you’re with your boyfriend.

Although these can all be warning signs that the party is over, it may just be that you need something to spice up your relationship, try speaking to a sexpert at http://www.thetextperts.co.uk/sex_advice.html, or maybe you both need a break. Whatever your situation and whatever the outcome remember the key to a successful relationship or a painless break up is, in the words of Aretha R.E.S.P.E.C.T.

For *** relationship advice speak to our Aunt at http://www.thetextperts.co.uk/agony_aunt.html



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Peter Nisbet asked:


There are several benefits of single online dating sites that attract people to using them. Contrary to a popular belief held by some people that those that use online dating sites cannot get a partner elsewhere, such sites tend to be used by those too busy to lead a full social life. They are unable to get out and about, so use dating sites as others would use a club or pub.

Many are full time professionals, working work long hours, and yet others work every evening and also night shifts. They are working when most others are out enjoying themselves and meeting people, and need some other avenue where they can make social contact. Many visitors to singles sites and online dating agencies are highly intelligent and very good looking people who have been unable to find a suitable partner from the small circle in which they have the time to be involved, and want to see what us available in the wider world.

Single online dating sites are ideal for such people, but also for others who have had similar problems finding a suitable partner, but for different reasons. Some live in remote locations, where a visit to the cinema is a mini expedition. If your nearest night club is 100 miles away, what do you do? Yet others are shy, and find it hard to talk face to face with the opposite *** or even the same *** since single dating agencies offer their services to people of all sexual persuasions.

These probably cover the main benefits: they offer a service to people who are unable to meet others for one reason or another and the opportunity to come into contact with other like-minded people with the same problems. Here are a few more benefits of single online dating sites:

1. They are anonymous, and so good for those that feel self conscious or are afraid of being rejected. You can use a false name and the contact services provided by the online dating agency. In fact you are encouraged to do so, because you should never provide your real details, especially an address, email or geographical, until you have met and are absolutely certain of the person with whom you are communicating.

2. They generally have a large database of people in the same situation as you are. They too want to find a partner, and are likely just as nervous as you are at the whole process of doing so. They are fine when they have finally found one, but the finding can be a bit daunting and worrying for them. So don’t think you are alone: you are definitely not!

3. The ‘Profile’ service allows you to screen people before finally being given a selection that meets your requirements, but try not to be too picky in these requirements. It’s OK to say you prefer a blue eyed blond, but if you also require her to be 5 foot 6 inches tall with hair down to her shoulder blades and to love Dvorjak and dogs, then you are pretty well restricting yourself to a very narrow choice. You need to have some screening, because it’s no use you, as a virtual alcoholic, dating a dedicated prohibitionist, but try not to be too restrictive with it.

4. Single online dating services enable you to chat to people online and get to know them before you have to meet them. You should chat to as many as possible that meet your main criteria, and it is fine to be chatting to several at the same time. There’s no two-timing online, and it is recognized as the best way to find a suitable partner. Once you meet somebody online that you feel you get along with, then you can perhaps arrange to meet.

Be careful when you agree to meet, because not all people are truthful: in fact 30% of men and 18% of women believe that lying on online dating sites is OK. Some people, and this is a good idea, insist on talking via webcam before meeting, so that at least you won’t find your 18 year old bombshell to be a 55 year old *******. These things happen, and you should be aware of it. Sweeping them under the carpet doesn’t help, and more online dating sites should warn you of the fact and many do, in fact bring the security of online dating sites to your attention.

If you take care and follow all the rules given to you by your chosen single online dating site, then you should be able to find the person of your dreams safely and have a lot of fun while doing so.



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Ann Marier asked:


The unthinkable has happened. Your baby girl - wasn’t she in diapers just a few weeks ago - has announced that she wants to go on a date. If you’re like most parents, your first reaction is probably to lock her in a tower like Rapunzel until she comes to her senses. But that will only prolong the inevitable. Instead, why not follow this first dating advice to make sure her first date is safe and fun.

First Dating Advice #1: Insist Upon Meeting the Boy

Teenage fashion being what it is, try to keep an open mind about the color of his hair and clothing and about the number of tattoos and body piercings. Instead, focus on his behavior. Does he treat your daughter with respect? When you speak to him, does he respond appropriately? Trust your gut instinct. If your intuition warns you there is something amiss, cancel the date.

First Dating Advice #2: Ask When, Where, With Whom, and How Long

Ask your daughter to describe the evening’s plan in detail. (When you meet her date, you can ask him the same question to make sure the details match.) Feel free to nix any part of the plan you don’t like. (E.g., “A movie sounds great, but I don’t want you going to that party afterwards.”)

First Dating Advice #3: Make Sure Your Daughter Has a Way to Get in Touch with You

Give your daughter a cell phone and a couple of quarters in case she needs to use a payphone. Make sure she knows all your numbers (home, cell, work, etc.). Tell her that if she ever feels uncomfortable or thinks she is in danger to call you immediately. Tell her that you will come immediately and that any discussion of what happened can be postponed until the next day if necessary. Make sure your daughter knows you are strong enough to hear anything she has to say.

First Dating Advice #4: Debrief

Wait up for your daughter after the date. Observe her mood and behavior. Does she seem happy or sad? Does she walk steadily? Is there alcohol on her breath? The next day, ask your daughter to tell you about the date. Share any observations you may have made. (E.g., “You say you had a great time, but when you came in last night you slammed the front door and you looked really angry. What was that about?”).

Your daughter’s first date can be a frightening experience for you as a parent. Using this first dating advice can help keep your daughter safe and you sane.



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Rodrigo Rehn asked:


Though the internet has opened avenues for everyone to meet on a common platform there are many downsides to this medium. This is a place where everybody has the freedom to say anything about themselves.

There is no quality check or any kind or legislation meant for safety which is an easy and vulnerable means of attacking unsuspecting individuals. The online dating sites do emphasize on use of stringent measures to filter the profiles of the registered members but, do you think it is possible to keep a track of so many people?

Thus you have to ensure your own safety and be responsible or else bear the consequences. So watch your step. We give you a few tips on how to minimize the risks of online dating.

Do not reveal personal information

It is very normal for someone to get carried away while dating online but one of the important rules of this dating game is to have your head on your shoulders and not act foolishly like giving out personal information such as telephone numbers and addresses.

This information is enough for the most likely criminals or any person with wrong intentions to track you down or misuse the details for personal benefit. The decision to not divulge any personal information can help immensely to minimize the risks of online dating.

Read the warning signs

This is a very good tip to minimize the risks of online dating. When you converse with your online date through emails or chat sessions, pay attention to what they are saying.

Some dominant characteristics like foul temper or unstable behavioral changes or mood swings are signs that should be taken into consideration. There are several such signs which may seem unusual to you as a normal person is attribute.

We do not say that no one has these characteristics in some amounts but you could be dealing with extreme cases, and moreover you do not want an online date who would either abuse you or ridicule you right? Such a relationship is doomed from the beginning.

Meet your date in a crowded area

When you meet someone online what guarantee is there that they are not putting on pretence? People with deceitful nature have no qualms about masking themselves.

They may be the sweetest people on earth, charming as ever not capable of harming anybody. But in reality the picture might be totally reversed. Make sure when you fix the meeting, it is done with the knowledge of your parents and friends and it is during daytime in a busy area.

This is an effective way to minimize the risks of online dating. Make sure your date does not accompany you back home for you do not know the person yet and do not fall prey to their insistence for your own safety sake.



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Francis Githinji asked:


Top online dating sites will offer a more superior quality and service compared to other sites. This is the main reason why they have found themselves on top. Good service is usually not easy to find. This is because there are many online dating sites that tend to confuse singles. It is vital to filter all these sites and ensure that you land on the top site. Not all top online dating sites come with superior features. Many are just popular because they have a popular brand name. It can be a challenge analyzing these top online dating sites. The only thing you are required to do is to find out what kind of service they provide. Then, you will judge whether you want that kind of service. If you are gay, you will be looking for the top dating sites for gays. The same goes for other categories. Top sites will come with many features and, the most common has to do with cost. Many people want to go for a service that seems to be fair. This days, sites have generated new pay plans that are flexible and efficient. You can pay for as low as a month to a year. You also have the option of withdrawing any time. Top sites ensure that clients or singles are comfortable with the price plan. This is a major factor to consider, when you are looking for good top sites. You do not have to search the sites one by one, the Internet has made your work easier by giving you a list of top rated sites.

Top online dating sites usually have the proper content needed to facilitate the dating process. First, they come with the all important dating tips. There is nothing more vital than this knowledge. The know how has enriched many relationships to become stronger and more informed. More and more singles come out of bad relationships with no sense of direction. Top sites ensure empowerment of members not to repeat the same mistakes of the past. The provide experts who are qualified and trusted in guiding singles in their experiences. Top online dating sites usually come with a clear and concise way of communicating. Simplicity is what all people are looking for. The process of registration must be easy and straight forward; this is what makes tops sites. The other thing is security. Online dating sites have the duty of ensuring that the members are safe. There are several strategies that top online dating sites employ. The first thing is to have a strict policy on safety. This goes a long way to display commitment to providing a good service. Screening of backgrounds and stern warnings are among the strategies the groups employ to ensure they discourage criminals in their path.

Top sites are made by experience and success stories. Testimonials will speak for themselves. Before you join top sites, read a few of them and get a preview of the kind of success you expect. It is encouraging to know that there are top sites you can rely on to match you.



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Francis Githinji asked:


This particular dating story is a piece of advice to many men out there who are hoping to lure some love from their girls of interest. It is a mistake many men make and you should be wise enough to learn from it. This particular eligible man was living in New York. He was single for a long time and wanted to try meeting single ladies who were ready to have fun in dating. He chose to try his luck through art gallery openings which is a rather good choice. In such a place you can find an ideal partner for whatever your goals are. There was free wine, hors d’oeuvres, champagne and brown beer. Women of all social classes, professions, shapes and sizes gathered to see the art display.

The attendants usually enjoy food pretending to be liking what they saw. It is very funny at the end of the day. The gentleman had his eyes wandering when he happened to spot a drop dead gorgeous girl with another. Being the man he was, he walked up to them and tried a start up line. Fortunately the pick-up line worked just fine resulting in to smoothly flowing conversation. From her attitude and response, he could tell she was liking it. Her friend read the signals and allowed us some privacy. She was comfortable with him since she didn’t offer any objection when the girl friend walking away. Feeling excited the dude spiced up the conversion to win even more of her interest. Sounds like a rather interesting dating story.

When the girlfriend joined them again, the dude was smart enough to excuse himself this time round. It was the best seducing move i can tell you. He knew she was interested but moved away. This guy understood that what was important is not whether he liked her but whether she liked him. From a distance he kept on watching her. When he sensed that the girls were about to leave the event, he approached them and said ” it was a pleasure talking to you i will probably see you in the next art gallery ” her response was quite good. “won’t you ask for my contacts?” happy with himself he asked the phone number. He didn’t have a pen and so he promised to remember it off head. “Are you sure you will remember?” the lady asked. Hope you are getting the positive lesson from this dating story. She was almost believing that the guy was just brushing her off.

She was a real beauty and may be no other man had ever talked to her without asking her out for a date. He was proving to be a real challenge while unknown to her he was overly excited. He made a big dating mistake by calling the elegant lady almost immediately. What he did next cost him a lot. This dating story is a warning to all men. Never reveal too much about yourself even before the first date. The talked for two and a half hours and the man talked about himself all the way. It is un gentleman like to talk while the lady listens. The roles should be reversed. The girl could not take it anymore and blurted “shut up, never call me again”. What a dating story!



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Rodrigo Rehn asked:


It is amazing how the human mind works for a little novelty and thrilling experience. Now that all of us know about the various categories of dating, do you think we have had enough? Sometimes our thirst for something new and exhilarating makes us experiment with new ideas making us steer on the edge.

Ever heard of blind dates? You must have. It is not a new concept. Blind dating is a method of going out on dates with total strangers. You do not have any information regarding this person. You might be going out with your building janitor or for that matter, even with one of your friends parent.

Scary? It is, but for some it is equal to getting a high. Blind dates are usually of two types. The first type is that you are completely in the dark about your date with no information whatsoever. This form of blind dating could be dangerous and disappointing especially if that person does not measure up to your expectations.

The other type of blind date is when you have not met the person actually, but you know him through emails, chats and phone conversations. We give you a few blind dating fundamentals so that your date does not end in a disastrous way nor puts you in any awkward position

Have low expectations

Considering that you are going out on the second type of blind date, keep your expectations low till you meet the person. It may so happen that the deep throated voice or the seductive husky voice may be of a bald man or an overweight woman respectively. Keeping low expectations in the beginning will even help you to keep your frustrations at bay.

Do not prolong the meeting

When you meet this person fix a short duration for your meeting so that you can gracefully exit out, should you feel the need to escape from there.

Do not arrange for dinner or lunch rendezvous where you may have difficulty in excusing yourself from an unpleasant experience. If however you like the other person, then you can extend your meeting or promise him a second meeting very soon.

Do not pretend to be someone else

This is one of the blind dating fundamentals which everybody tends to forget or rather ignore. For if you do intend to continue the relationship further you will have to take off the mask sooner or later. Let the other person know in the first meeting only who you are.

Get to know the other person better

The blind dating fundamentals propose that you pay attention to your date as to what he is saying so that you get an idea of his characteristics which is highly essential to weigh the compatibility quotient.

You should recognize some signals which warn you of on toward perils in case you wish to see him again. Make a note when he talks excessively about his previous girlfriend, or uses derogatory remarks for his mother or girlfriend or treats others with contempt.



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