Tim Zelmer asked:


There was a time when the largest determining factor in any romantic relationship was proximity. The girl next door, down the street or on the other side of town was pretty much the extent of the options available for most single men. As travel became easier - and more necessary for work - after the Second World War, the field broadened and people from different states and even different countries began getting together. Still, however, proximity was the overriding factor in the vast majority of relationships. Letters and the occasional telephone call were all well and good, but it was difficult to sustain a relationship when there was only at best sporadic contact and no visual contact at all.

All of that changed, however, with the advent of the Internet, and the various ancillary technologies that have grown with it - such as voice communication, instant messaging and webcams. Communication with people on the other side of the country - or the other side of the world - is now not only possible, but commonplace. With the explosion of the information age and the openness and ease of communications afforded by the Internet, international online dating has become a multi-billion dollar a year industry, with millions of men and women participating in it. Women in Greece are now enjoying the time they spend online with men in Ottawa, and men in St. Louis are forging meaningful and rewarding relationships with women in the Ukraine.

As with any other form of romantic relationship building, international dating brings with it new and, in some cases, unfamiliar challenges. While it is true that people all over the world share common needs and desires, people from different cultures possess different customs and belief systems and, in some cases, process information differently. Assuming, for instance, that forging a relationship with a woman in Moscow is going to be exactly the same as charming a girl from Cleveland is probably not going to work out terribly well. Below are a few things to keep in mind as you hit the international online dating scene.

• Language Differences: Obviously if you find yourself an online dating interest from an English speaking country (assuming, of course, that your primary language is English) then this shouldn’t be an issue, but what about if your interest - to use our above example - is a woman in Moscow? Basically, most people who look into international online dating will be able to speak English at some level, but their proficiency with the language will vary greatly. The key to meaningful communication is to make certain that, until you are sure of how well a woman understands English, you keep things fairly basic. Avoid using long, complex words or sentences to express your thoughts to begin with, because there is every chance that if you don’t you will spend as much time explaining yourself as you will getting to know the woman. Be patient, and be prepared to explain what you mean when asked - and also be prepared to help her ‘find the right words’. Open communication and clear dialogue is essential to building any romantic relationship online.

One thing you should always avoid at first is “text speak”, until you are very comfortable with the woman you are communicating with. “LOL, “BRB” “BBIAB” and other such examples are certainly common enough in the states, but unless the woman you are communicating with is familiar with them, they will seem like gibberish - and could even serve to lower her first (or second, or third) impression of you. Additionally, you will want to keep your use of slang to a minimum at first. If the woman has only remedial or even intermediate English skills, she is likely not to have mastered even frequently used slang terms as yet.

• Humor: One aspect of a man’s personality that survey after survey indicates is extremely attractive to women is his sense of humor. The ability to make a woman laugh is important to not only getting any relationship off on the right foot, but also to building the relationship and moving it forward. In the world of international online dating, humor is a necessary component of forging a mutually satisfying relationship - but the rules are a little different. In order for you to make your international dream-girl laugh, she is going to have to get the joke, and actually find it funny.

Part of the concern here harkens back to the language challenges mentioned earlier. Jokes or quips that rely heavily on double entendre or word play - i.e. “Last night I shot an elephant in my pajamas, what he was doing in my pajamas I’ll never know” - will only work with your online partner if she has sufficient English skills to appreciate them. Another area to avoid - at least at first - is humor that is heavily dependent on sarcasm. Not only can sarcasm be very challenging to someone with limited English skills, but it simply doesn’t translate very well to the instant message and/or chat room medium. Generally, it is better to avoid using it until your relationship has progressed to the talking and/or streaming live video stage.

• Time Zones and scheduling: Of course, if you are considering international online dating you are probably going to realize that time differences will exist between you and your partner. However, along with realizing that the difference in time is there, it is important that you keep in mind what these differences mean in terms of your relationship. For instance, returning to the example of our woman in Moscow, if you are in New York City (Eastern Time Zone) then when you get home from work at 5:00 and sign online, it will be 1:00 AM at your online girl friend’s place! Conversely, if you want to have a chat with her just before you go to bed, the odds are that she will have just awakened and be rushing around (as we all do) to get ready for work.

One of the keys to international online dating is scheduling time with a woman you are interested in, and then remaining on that schedule if at all possible. This will require a bit of give and take on both your parts - staying up a little later, getting up a little earlier or blocking out lots of time on the weekends. Remember to be considerate of her time, if you expect her to be considerate of yours!

• International Online Dating services: While there are many ways to meet women from other countries online, many busy people (both male and female) choose to use online dating services to make their initial connections. While virtually all of these services charge their customers fees, some studies indicate that not only does using services of this type decrease the time it takes to meet a person you are interested in, but also increases the likelihood that your online relationship will progress into something special and fulfilling. When looking for an international online dating service, make certain that their website is secure, and verified by independent agencies (McAfee, GoDaddy, etc) as being safe. Make certain that they list their fees upfront, and make certain that they offer everything you are looking for (private chats, streaming video chats, etc) before you sign up. Just like anything else, when you are shopping for an international online dating service, make certain you read the fine print.

International online dating can be a very fun and rewarding experience - and there is no reason not to think that if you lucky, you might actually meet the woman of your dreams. But as with anything else in life that is new and different, it is important to understand some of the basics before getting into it. By following a few simple rules, and making certain that you communicate in a clear and considerate manner, who knows … the perfect woman might actually be in Moscow, and yet only as far away as your laptop!



Dating Humor

Rodrigo Rehn asked:


Compatibility depends on quite a number of factors but they are often not given adequate importance. Many of you choose your dates according to your preference and never give it a thought whether the partner is matching with you or not. This is the reason why there are many relationships which break due to poor compatibility.

Now many of you will consult the astrological or tarot readings to find out whether you two are compatible or not. But there are many things that you can understand just using your common sense and eyes. The few compatibility facts that you need to consider are listed below.

Physical compatibility

There are quite a number of break-ups that occur because the partners are not physically compatible with each other. But when they started dating simply overlooked this but had to realize later. Physical and sexual compatibility has an important role to play in ones life.

If you are an obese person and never heard the name of an exercise ball then the chances are very low that you will be a compatible match with an athlete or a model. You two will not even have a common topic to talk about and the mentality will be absolutely different from each other.

Location

If you are from Africa and your date is from Australia then the chances of making a compatible match with each other is not really high. The two of you will not know much about the locations and often have different mind set. It will not be easy to meet the partner.

Moreover the outlooks of two people depend on their country and socio-economic condition of the society. So being from the same place really helps to work out a match.

Sense of humor

The sense of humor of two people should be matching perfectly. This is something that is given least priority but the partners with different idea about humor often fail to share similar emotions.

If you cracking a joke and your partner does not even get a hint to laugh then you will simply feel miserable. This should not occur with any of you and make sure that both of you understand your jokes and humor.

Background of the date

The background both individual as well as family is an important point to be considered seriously. This is not really a good idea to hide something about your past from the partner as you will definitely not expect the same from the other person.

Moreover if you two belong to completely different backgrounds then there can be some clashes in future regarding the outlook and perspectives which can prove to be fatal for the relationship.

These are few factors that you should think about to judge your dates compatibility with you.



Caffeinated Content

David_DeAngelo asked:


Here’s how I mentally approach meeting a new woman: I’m cocky and funny, I steal their lines, I tease them, and I don’t ever give them a break.

In my opinion, your most valuable asset, no matter your looks, height, age, or income – is humor.

I don’t care if you’re four feet tall and have one eye. If you can make women laugh consistently and get those good feelings flowing through them, they’ll love you.

I decided last year to start actually STUDYING comedy, as I’ve found that people (women) respond to it better than any other thing in the whole entire universe. So I did a bunch of research on the Internet to find the best books, and I bought about 5 or 6 of them.

One book that I read called Comedy Writing Secrets by Melvin Helitzer made a great point. He said that the majority of humor revolves around the character and not the jokes.

Most of the guys that I meet who want to learn to meet women are working on the ‘jokes’ in their life and not the ‘character’. I did it for about two years myself. I tried to learn all kinds of lines and B.S.

It finally dawned on me that women were not really that concerned with all of that… they wanted a particular character. The lines didn’t matter as long as they fit in with the character. Now that I have created this character for myself, things are all different. Women now call me. They pursue me. They want to be around me. It’s strange, magical, and weird.

So what’s the character that they want? Good question. I have a good friend who’s the best I’ve ever seen at picking up women in bars and having *** with them that night. Now, I do better getting numbers and following up. But this guy is just a machine. And his whole mindset towards meeting women is to be “cocky and funny” (his words). My opinion is that women are turned off by arrogant men, unless… they’re damn funny. This magic combination will attract women like Bill Clinton attracts chubby interns. I’m following in my buddy’s footsteps.

I’ll try to summarize the character that I’ve developed:

“I know that this girl is secretly trying to pick me up… I’m going to play hard to get, make fun of her, be indifferent towards her, and generally bust her balls as much as possible. I know that she loves a guy that is so sarcastic that it makes her nervous, so I’m going to really keep the heat on… and when she starts to show any interest at all on the outside, I’m going to blow her off and make her prove to me that she wants me… so I can reject her again.”

I do crazy things, like if I’m standing next to a girl at a bar, I’ll turn to her and say in a completely serious voice, “Will you PLEASE stop touching me?” And then look them right in the eye.

Or say, “What are you doing at a bar for god sakes? Can’t you find a nice normal guy? Or are you desperate?” All with a completely straight face.

I say things that make them actually think that I’m serious, but leave a shadow of a doubt.

Here’s what I’m looking for: If they respond in an insecure way and say, “Oh, I’m sorry… I didn’t know that I was touching you”, I’ll keep it going… and say, “Well, you did. And if you’re going to keep doing it, I’d appreciate it if you’d touch a little higher.” They ***** up.

If they shoot something funny back like, “Well, touchy touchy” and they know that I’m kidding, I just stay in character and say, “Yes, I don’t like being touched. So keep a foot or so between us please” and keep it going.

And yes, sometimes (not often) I’ll meet a cold one and she’ll get uptight – I just walk away.

If you’re going to do this, you have to remember to keep it going for the entire time… don’t turn into a dumb *** at the first sign of her liking you. Keep up the character, play hard to get, etc. forever!



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Andres Munoz asked:


You decided to make the first step and join a dating site but you are stuck in creating a sizzling online dating profile that women will read. So what makes a great profile? Follow these tips and rocket to success with your online dating life.

One thing must be said about online dating there is so shame in putting yourselves out there online. Don’t be embarrassed in fact a successful man will never be ashamed if he’s using online dating services for dates.

1) A well written profile:

First things first - use a word processor and spell checker. Nothing spells “loser” than a poorly written profile with misspelled words. This may seem obvious but I’ve seen profiles as though they have been written by 5 year olds.

2) Don’t write about past relationships:

Don’t ever complain about past relationships in your profile! Don’t ever talk about bad experiences and how you are now looking for true love. This is an absolute deal killer and no women will click your profile.

3) Don’t tell your life story:

Keeping a little bit of mystery about yourself will have them wanting to know more about you. It’s okay to talk about some of your hobbies and maybe some of your travels but never offer the whole picture. Always leave intrigue, women love men that have a little mystery around them.

4) Stay positive!

This is an absolute must if you want to score big with online dating you need to show positive qualities. For instance avoid at all costs writing anything negative about your life. Your profile must read as if you are having a great time just keep in mind if you begin to sound negative or boring how do you expect to attract women? Avoid talking about your job, past relationships and any past issues you have had. No one wants to hear it let alone read it.

Tip: If you love music talk about music, if your passion is art then write a little blurb about your favorite artist or your studio. Women love men that are passionate about something.

5) Use humor in your profile.

I can’t stress enough how important this is. Humor is an the #1 aphrodisiac in attracting women. So how do you pull this off in your profile? Inject some witty humor when writing about yourself or even the type of women you are looking for. It’s not enough to say you are humorous you must also display it when writing your profile.

There you have it! These 5 sizzling online dating profile tips will increase your chances by leaps and bounds simply because most profiles are weak and dull. Your profile will be a breath of fresh air and most likely attract the caliber of women you are seeking.

Your profile is meant to portray confidence, humor and intrigue. It’s no different with offline dating these are the major characteristics women look for in men. The same holds true online you are doing the exact same thing just in the digital world.



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